Friday, 1 April 2016

Hello World : Virgin Identifier

On behalf of the Hyderabad Machine-language Engineers Network (HYMEN), I am extremely happy to announce that we have come out with a technology solution to identify whether a girl is a virgin or not. The name of our product is VirIde (pronounced We Ride), short for Virgin Identifier. It can be applied in a very discreet and non-intrusive way, and solves a huge problem burdening our society.

It has been a very natural law through out human evolution that males have always wanted uninhibited fun in their pre-marital age, but display obsessive preference to virgins when they want to marry. How can one know whether a girl is virgin or not? There is no way to find out this fact without violating the legal, ethical, and probity standards of our age.

We believed that this is an important problem to be solved. Hence we made use of the various tools of data sciences and machine learning algorithms and have come out with a unique solution that will be a game changer in human relations. The HYMEN data scientists collaborated with researchers from Indian Institute of Information Tecknology (IIIT), Hyderabad, Indian School of Business (ISB), Hyderabad and other reputed institutes in order to maintain the scientific accuracy of the product.

Our methodology is simple. It is based on the axiomatic concept that virgins walk in a certain way and non-virgins walk in a certain way. There are two major criteria of evaluation.

The first criterion is the Buttock Sway Direction (BSD). The buttocks of virgins move predominantly in the forward - backward direction. For non-virgins, the buttocks movement is predominantly in the upward - downward direction. The critical factor to calculate here is the ratio of the forward-backward buttock displacement to the upward-downward buttock displacement. This is the FBUD ratio.

In the second criterion, the measurement is on the side; it is the peak amplitude of the hip in the sideward direction when a woman walks. This displacement as a ratio of the single step distance (SDR) of the woman's walk is a constant for virgins and a different constant for non-virgins.

We had invited volunteer women to take part in our project. They were confirmed virgins and non-virgins. The response to our invitations has been incredible and we are very pleased with the cooperation extended by our volunteers. We are very much indebted to these women who shed their inhibitions and took part in our game-changing project.

In the evaluation, we made our volunteers walk and recorded their FBUDs and SDRs. For the second parameter, we took accurate measurements of the side sway of their kameez, skirt or tops when they walk and subtracted the thickness of the cloth to get the correct sideway displacement.

We also correlated the data with various parameters like their age, height, weight etc. We now have a scientifically established training dataset of virgins and non-virgins with various virginity determining parameters.

In the field of machine learning, classification algorithms are those that categorize an entity as one of two binary categories, as shown in the following diagram:

Given a woman's walking data, our solution applies the most appropriate classification algorithm to classify the woman as a virgin or non-virgin.

How the classification algorithm is selected is the real core IP of this product. Our attorneys have applied for patenting the solution in all countries of the world. They are working round-the-clock to get the approvals expedited.

Thereafter, we foresee a tremendous realization of value from VirIde and we are in the midst of discussions with venture capitalists. In the next few days, we will be announcing our Series-A round of funding. Please stay tuned for more updates on this.

Future applications: The next phases of this technology evolution offer immense possibilities. We will have robots that can walk behind a woman, identify the required statistics and relay it back to our database. For those areas where robots are not feasible, we are also working on wearables like Google Glass, that will immediately inform you about a woman's virginity. This wearable project called VirIde Glass will involve real-time interactions of image processing, data science, mobile and cloud technologies.

We have shared our solution with a few selected personalities here in Hyderabad. Our problem-solving attitude, technology approach and civilizational benefits have been applauded.
Speaking about our project, technology evangelist and VP (Products) of Regress, Mr. Lamesh Joganathan, standing on a rock in LaMakaan in Banjara Hills, said "Hyderabad Startups Rock. This is a different kind of upstart compared to our startups. Hyderabad is a happening city, and I am happy that we use our hindsight to produce such path-breaking solutions."
Journalist and author Mr. FreeRam Verri said, "I am an atheist, liberal and capitalist. These are the valves on which a modern economy is built. And this product is in tune with all those. I am of the firm belief that it increase the choices that people have. This is not a matter of objectification, but of objectivist epistemology. Ayn Rand would approve."

Once again, we thank the HYMEN researchers, IIIT / ISB sceintists and our women volunteers for their tremendous contribution to our extremely scientific, innovative and game-changing product.

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